It's been days since I've been away and pretending to be the housewife.
I need a rush of faith and it's about time I've made time for that.
I can't help but make excuses over and over again.
Why I can't flake out 1-2 hours on a particular day for my faith rush.
It's been more than nine months since I've gone to the "Saturday halaqa" at "Sr. Amina's house."
Halaqa means a get-together to talk about Islam.
For example, we talk about how to become a better Muslim by honoring and respecting your parents, being honest, and how to be sincere in your actions.
We don't say, "You should do GOOD things. You shouldn't do BAD things. The End. Go home."
Seriously.
After doing a little bit of self reflection, I thought about some of the characteristics I'm trying to improve in myself. I know of two off the top of my head that can be worked on. But I do realize I'm human and need somewhere to feed into that reminder.
I can make 100 excuses of why I can't do something. I can blame people. I can accept failure. But why not be proactive?
Before I got married (excuse #1 for not being able to "do anything") and had a kid (excuse #2) I made a commitment to attend as many Islamic lectures as possible. So that included weekly Muslim Students Association 30-45 min. lectures at the college library, the Saturday program, a Sunday program (which I now coordinate) and sometimes combined men-woman halaqas at school. At the time I was also taking a class about Prophet Muhammad's life.
That's what got me motivated.
There was so much to learn! (And so little time.)
But now I'm busier than ever, If I want to be.
For example I could wait for cooking and cleaning instructions, and to feed my baby the last minute and not pray exactly on time so then I can't get out last minute for programs. I could also not have a ride, but also not ask anyone to pick/drop me off. I could also take in cultural formalities and try to do all the housework and wait on people to finish what they're done eating to clean up after them. Or let them do it themselves.
I could also say "Well my husband is home" or "I have to take care of my child" or "I can't leave the house with my elderly in-laws at home" or I can do them in a balanced proportion.
Too much of anything is not good.
Make strong intentions to do good and God will help you attain those goals.
Usually Saturday mornings we have a lot to cook. Today I wanted to go to the Saturday program, which I had been thinking about for the past three days. We didn't have a lot of cooking. I helped. I ate. I prayed and went to program. I did a little bit of everything.
There were no random guests. There were no excuses, no complaints nor was there any ride problems (although I didn't have my own car and did have to get picked up by my awesome father).
I feel motivated. I feel great.
I got my faith rush.
Picture: UH Houston, TX Facebook group
