Planned Parenthood

People say they can plan when they want to have kids. But is it really true?

There are three things that are pre-written for us:

1. When you're born and who your parents.
2. When you will die.
3. Who your spouse will be.

Therefore, according to that if you are destined to be with certain parents at a certain time, can they really "plan" when they have you?

Similarly I've heard the argument that if you're really careful, then you can avoid parenthood. Um no.

Even if you "plan" not have to have kids for say five years, when you do want to have kids in the sixth year, you cannot pinpoint the exact year, month, or day when it will happen. According to sunnah, a couple can concieve a child within a year if God so wills.

And even then, what if you just can't have kids and didn't know? Or in one case a woman lost her child during pregnancy and may not ever be able to get pregnant again without severely endangering her life.

If you look at Prophet Zakariyah, his wife and him were impotent. He did not have a child until he was in the feeblest age and with the help of dua. Allah so willed.

Vigin Maryam had Prophet Jesus without a husband or a mate. Allah so willed.

Prophet Ibrahim cohabited with Hajira and had Ismail because Sarah was unable to have children. Suddenly she had Isaac. Allah so willed.

Nothing is planned. It's all in Allah's divine plan. Destiny is written, but fate can change with duas. So you can make duas to help you and try your best to do what's best for this world and the hereafter.

If you're "planning" to have children later, ask for the best time.
If you're "planning" to have children sooner, make dua to be well-qualified and prepared. If you're not "planning" for anything, just believe...if Allah so wills it can happen.

Ameen.